We ("we" meaning everyone alive) do weird things.
Doing weird things causes more weird things to happen, to which we respond weirdly.
It's a whole cycle of weirdness.
And I don't think it's a bad thing, because a lot of the time, life is weird.
All that was a sort of explanation or justification for the weird things I may say in this blog and in the blogs to come. I've been writing more lately than I have for a while, but I haven't posted anything because... well... it's weird. I wrote an essay for a class about my grandma passing away last April, and I wrote a sarcastic barista monologue, and I've been writing a ton of letters and notes. My to-do list is a blog in and of itself. And I have a ton of things to say because I've been thinking about a ton of things.
But for a little while I worried about what would happen if I posted those things, because it's a weird combination of things. Who posts a essay about a grandparent passing away and a tongue-in-cheek rant about coffee on the same blog, without some sort of note from a therapist saying that I'm crazy but not dangerous?
Apparently, I do.
And I do it because I'm a weird person living in a weird world where weird things happen and we say weird things about it.
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Now, about the "I love you" on my cell phone.
I know that Sprint has those preset messages, which also include "Can't answer, text me" and "Where are you?" and "Stop talking before I throw this $300 phone out the window" (okay, maybe that isn't really one of them, but I feel like it would be useful), on the phone to be helpful and to save time. They're all things that people say pretty often, I suppose, so it's gotta be easier to just hit two buttons than a bunch of letters.
Or Sprint just puts them there to take up space, another one of those useless but kind of cool tools like the currency calculator or a ringtone that sounds like water.
But "I love you" ? Come on.
If someone can't take the time to type it out, do they really, really need to be saying it?
Maybe that's an unnecessary logic bomb to drop before noon, but really! Really? Really.
Isn't "I love you" a statement that should take some effort? Some risk?
In movies, an "I love you" text or Facebook comment or shout-out at the end of a love song posted on YouTube: "______ wth lyrikzzzz, OMGez! thiz 4 u babee!" is totally okay, it demonstrates a depth of feeling that could move mountains or leap across burning buildings. But I'm not enough of a romantic (okay, I'm not a romantic at all, at least in the commonly accepted definition of the word) to believe life is like the movies.
Now I want to explain myself, because I feel like I'm not making any sense.
I just deleted this whole little example about a boy named "Edgar" and a girl named "Liza" and how they find creative ways to say "I love you," like yelling it across the street and up at windows and in notes under windshield wipers, in surprise dinners and washed cars, in doing what the other loves even if he/she doesn't love it, in everything they do together. The point of the story would have been that Edgar and Liza were both better off for not ever letting the act of saying "I love you" be boring or easy or even simple.
And I guess I just ended up telling the example anyway.
I guess what I'm getting at is that if I ever fall in love, I don't want to use the preset text message in my phone. I don't ever want to take it for granted or let it be easy. I want to mean it, I want saying it to feel like jumping off a building or getting a tattoo, because every single time it means something new, it's a new risk and new commitment.
That's all.
